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Was I Stupid?
So this morning I woke up and sitting on my facebook wall was this from someone I respect very much and has drum corps connections:
"Landry- the Troopers have a timpani spot they need to fill. Let me know if you're interested and I'll put you in touch with the right people."
I said no. Why?
- Mentally: I'm the kind of person who needs to think things over. On the outside I'm outgoing, but on the inside I'm very shy and timid. I couldn't imagine being thrown into that situation, having to buy supplies, pack, pay for a plane ticket, learn the music, get adjusted to the lifestyle, and be ready for their premier on Wednesday the 20th, 6 days. Plus I'd start college drumline 2 days after I got back. My head would explode from all the stress.
- Physically: I'm a bigger kid,and I'm out of shape, I don't think I could handle going from a relaxed summer lifestyle into running A LOT longer than we did in my high school band and doing all the other stuff they do for conditioning, I'm out of shape and I think would hurt myself.
- Financially: I know I could probably set up a financial plan of some sort, but that'd pretty much trash any thoughts I had of marching next year while still trying to pay off what would be this summers fees. I couldn't ask help from my family because we aren't poor, but money is tight.
- Summer Plans: As much as I want to do drum corps, it would very be hard to drop seeing my Grandma who lives in Kansas for the first time in over a year, WTAMU band camp, and getting to see other family in a heartbeat.
I've been starting to get ready to do drum corps this summer, but I don't think I'm ready to just be thrown into it. I could handle the music, but that's about it honestly. I'm hitting myself in the head over it, but I think it's in my best interest. REALLY hope it was. :/
You're smart. Don't overbook yourself. Don't force drum corps onto yourself, because "it's a once in a lifetime thing." You'll hate yourself if you don't get with a corps you want and feel right with, don't prepare yourself, and can't handle the shock. I know lots of people who LOVE DCI, but did it and now said they'll never march again, because they forced it on themselves. I'm not talking open class either. I'm talking top 8.
Something similar happened with me and Revolution. I'm afraid to march a top 8 corps, because of my experience with them. Now I'm finally branching out and going to audition for BD as drum major next year. My best friend is over there and says that he thinks I'd make a good fit. So I figured I'd give it a try, at least.
You obviously thought things out and you are doing what's best for you. Doing something for somebody and you end up paying the literal and figurative price later on does nobody any good. You are far from stupid, Landry. You did the right thing.
You gave this a lot of thought and you made the choice that was right for you. Don't second guess that choice. When it's right you'll feel. You'll know it in your gut. Until that time comes, any other time is not the right time. Don't beat yourself up. Your life and your choices are about you and no one else. You're the one who has to live with them. Trust your instincts, my friend. They will rarely lead you astray.
I kinda have the same situation as you. I keep seeing some corps with baritone and contra holes, and as much as I want to fill one of those holes, this year is not my year.
I just finished my senior year band camp, but our parades and rehearsals over the summer are events that I can't miss because I have a duty to lead my sousaphone section, and most of your reasons for saying no.
I'm fine waiting for next year or the year after to audition for Glassmen or Bluecoats, (granted stuff like graduation and transitioning from high school to college isn't a conflict for next year). Your decision was right for you.
If you doubt whether or not you want to do something, you don't want to do it.
Rob Esrock was right "If you doubt whether or not you want to do something, you don't want to do it." I believe that.
I had the exact same thing happen to me in 2010. I had never marched drum corps before, and Crown had a baritone opening. I wasn't sure if I had the money, if I was in good enough shape, if I could deal mentally, as well as a few other variables. I asked my friends and family what they thought, and they said to go for it.
It was hard. everyone else had learned nearly the entire show (music and drill) and established friendships. Their bodies had gotten used to the lifestyle of rehearsing for 12 hours a day and drinking two gallons of water and getting 7 hours of sleep. I held on, and we went on tour after a week. I had managed to learn all of the drill, but wasn't quite there physically and had to sit out a few of the first shows. After that, everything clicked and those two months became the best thing that I have ever done with my life. It was an experience that I will never forget and significantly changed me as a person. There is nothing else like it and everyone should have the opportunity to march at least once.
If you still have the chance after this year, work towards the goal of marching. Its worth it. Because I came in with only a week left of spring training, I only had to pay $1000 for the entire summer.
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